Absolute Indulgence! Strawberries and Cream with a difference

Strawberry Meringue Gateau

I had a special request the other day from one of my dinner guests.  Could he have some proper custard with his steamed sticky toffee pudding, please, instead of salty caramel sauce?  Not a problem and best of all, my pal Ronnie, he of the Ecological Farm – Can Musson de Buen Honor, look it up on the www, its just an amazing enterprise, had given me a box of eggs straight from the chicken coop!  So – one delighted, custard connoisseur guest.

Ha, fooled you though, this recipe isn’t about making custard; I’ll do that another day.  Its on my usual theme, what to do with leftovers, in this case five amazing egg whites?  By the way the custard was mind blowing.

There was another stroke of luck at the market today too.  Big 2 kg boxes of Spanish strawberries for €4.98!  They’re big, almost certainly glasshouse grown and a bit under-ripe.  That isn’t a problem though, we’re not at Wimbledon.  That can be fixed, its easy.

So today’s crafty recipe is for meringues, of course, what else?  But not just ordinary meringues, Strawberry Meringue Gateau is my theme for today.

 

 

Sheer Indulgence

 

OK here we go, this is what we do.

First set the oven to 100 C and prepare two 21 cm flan tins by cutting circles of baking parchment to cover the base of each tin. Lightly grease their bases and sides with sunflower oil to prevent the finished meringues from sticking to the sides, then put the “cartouches” in (parchment circles to you and me!) and push then firmly into contact with the base of the tins.

Ingredients

Meringue

5 Eggs whites at room temperature

120 gm Caster Sugar

120 gm Icing sugar

Sunflower oil, a touch

Filling

500 gm strawberries

A small glug or two of Cointreau

1 tablespoon caster sugar

Cream

150 gm Mascarpone

250 ml whipping cream

50gm Icing sugar

Method

Meringue

In a clean glass or stainless steel (not plastic) bowl beat the egg whites with an electric whisk – on medium speed, until the mixture stands up in stiff peaks.

Add the caster sugar slowly to the egg white foam, a tablespoonful at a time whilst whisking on high speed, until the sugar is all used and mixture takes on a glossy sheen, then stop.

Lastly fold in the icing sugar one dessert spoon at a time, using a ‘figure of eight’ movement and taking care not to knock the air from the sugary foam.  If you try to cheat and beat it in with the electric whisk you will fail.  I’ve tried it and the end result resembles a sugary doorstep on which you could easily break your teeth!

After all the icing sugar has been thoroughly mixed in, put dollops of the mixture carefully and equally into the flan tins.  Smooth the tops, you’ll only be able to make them look ‘swirly’ because by now the mixture is quite gooey – try not to get splodges on the sides of the tins, they can get charred in the oven, make it difficult to extract the finished meringue from the tin and give it a burned taint.

Put the loaded tins on a lower mid shelf in the oven, set the timer for 90 minutes.  When timer pings, reduce the temperature to 80 C and reset the timer for another 60 minutes and wait.  What is happening here is that we are not cooking the meringues in a conventional sense; we are simply drying the egg/sugar mixture – Simples!

It is easy to tell if the meringues are ready, press VERY lightly on the top – if there is no “give” they’re done.  If you still feel a little movement, let them dry as the oven cools down, go to bed, have a stiff drink or take the dog for a walk until they finish.

When the meringues are lovely and crisp, take them from the oven and leave them aside to cool in the tins for half an hour or so.  You should see them break away slightly from the edges of the tins as they cool down.  Now for the tricky bit, getting the finished product out!  Try not to smash the meringue discs or you’ll have to revise your dessert offering to “Eton Mess.” Start by gently flexing the sides of the tin and then deflecting the base a little to free up the meringue – all being well it’s time to remove them.  Put a clean flat board over the top of the tin; flip the tin over and Voila!  The meringue plops on to the board – we hope!  Repeat!  We now have the job more or less licked, excuse the pun.

Let the meringues cool thoroughly to room temperature before starting to assemble the gateau.  If you don’t, your whipped cream will melt as you load the gateau and the cat will be all over the kitchen worktop having a birthday with the dripping cream!  At this stage meringue can be stored, either in the fridge or even the freezer.  Just make sure this you seal it well in an airtight plastic bag or it will go soggy.  It will anyway later, but at this stage you’ll want to present it looking pristine.

Filling and sauce (Coulis)

Wash and ‘hull’ the strawberries, drain them well and put them in a pan with a glug or so of Cointreau.

Shake the caster sugar over them.

Heat the pan until the juice from the strawberries, Cointreau and sugar melt together, don’t let the mixture boil, the fruit should still be firm’ish when you load the gateau.  Cover the pan with a lid and set aside to cool.

When the fruit is cold, drain and reserve the juice and a tablespoonful of fruit.

Reduce the juice/and reserved strawberries over a high heat, stirring constantly until it has a jam like feel.   Remove it from the heat immediately and blend it to a coulis with a high speed, hand held, electric blender.  Set it aside in a clean jug or bowl.

Cream

Put 250ml of 35% whipping cream into a clean, cold bowl.

Add the icing sugar and beat together with an electric mixer until the cream begins to thicken

Add the mascarpone to the mixture and continue to whip the cheese/cream mixture until it becomes firm.

Assemble the gateau

Put one round of meringue on to a clean circular board, ‘swirly’ side up if it is still attached; leave the cartouche on the base layer of meringue.  It helps when you cut and serve a slice.

 

Loading the filling

 

Load the top of the meringue with two thirds of the whipped cream, making a slight hollow in the centre and leaving perhaps 3cm free at the edge (‘coz you’re going to press down on the top layer soon and we don’t want it oozing out!)  Add the strawberries into the hollowed out cream “nest.”  Next, make sure that the cartouche is NOT attached to this, the second layer of meringue!  Then ‘butter’ the underside with most of the remaining cream, place it on top of the loaded base meringue/strawberry/cream  layer and gently press the layers together, saving just a little for decoration on the top.

Finally put about eight teaspoonful's of the remaining cream, evenly around the circumference of the top meringue, put a strawberry on top of each blob of cream.  Then relax, you’ve done it!!!  Get ready for the applause from your guests and avoid the bathroom scales for at least three weeks

If you wish, the gateau can be frozen at this stage, for no more than a week, do it straight away if you’re not planning to serve it same day, then the juices will not have time to soak into the meringue and make it soggy.  In fact I like to freeze mine anyway; it is easier to cut whilst it is frozen or semi-frozen.  Cut it first and de-frost for an hour before serving.

Serve with just a little of the coulis “napped” (drizzled in plain English) on top of each slice and on the plate.

!

 

Cooking for "Benefits Street" and another rant!

Cooking good nourishing food on a budget is NOT difficult, END OF!  Two recipes this week are examples.

I think all my followers know by now how I feel about the ridiculous amounts of money spent by the chefs in TV cooking competitions!  Its outrageous.  Not only that but most of the dishes wouldn't feed a dormouse!  Contrast this with the amazing examples of skill and expertise demonstrated by the likes of Michelle Roux Jr, Jamie Oliver, Rick Stein, James Martin and "The Gorgeous Pouting One" Nigella! Does anyone seriously believe that a woman with such a gorgeous Junoesque figure could possibly be a "cokehead" - if they do, they're deluded! They don't know what 'Charlie' does to its sad addicts and I've seen more than a few!

Oh and more rants.  Buy your ingredients from proper butchers, greengrocers, fishmongers and bakers, go to the markets, support them and they will help you to select the best ingredients.  Just tell them what you want to make and they'll become your friends.  Use supermarket groceries if you have to, but just think about the quantity of packaging they use and how many times your goods have been handled before you get them: And bl**dy 'sell by dates' and 'use by dates' are a complete con to encourage you to throw good stuff out.  What a waste of resources!  Try my test, the "Smell by Date."  If its smells OK cook it thoroughly and put it on the table!"

Lets get real and cook for a family for pennies (or centimos) this week. "En Avant Mes Braves."

First off a good nourishing North Country dinner for 'common sense Monday.'  Yes, that's what they used to call it when almost all the money had gone over the weekend on whippet racing and mild ale in the "Muckshovellers Arms;" and it was time to eke out the small change.  Ribs n' Cabbage is about the easiest thing in the recipe book.  It tastes fabulous, its warming and of course is loaded with healthy fibre for roughage.

WARNING it is also quite a "windy" dish - you have been warned!  Do not feed leftovers to the dog unless you have ample supplies of 'Air Wick' spray or gas masks!

Ribs n' Cabbage

Sorry but this dish doesn't photograph well, so I'm sending you a picture of the "Gorgeous Pouting Nigella" instead.

Ingredients - for four servings

• 1 Large green 'Savoy' cabbage.
• 6/8 Meaty spare ribs from the wide end of the rack.
• 1 Chicken stock cube.
• 1 Litre water.

Method

• Remove the outer leaves from the cabbage, wash and reserve.
• Check that the remaining cabbage is clean and bug free then shred it finely, including the heart, just chop it even smaller!
• Put all the shredded cabbage in a lidded earthenware 'crockpot.'
• Rinse the ribs (two per person - three for hearty eaters) in cold water, chop each into two pieces and add them to the pot.
• Mix the ribs and cabbage together with a clean hand - it won't hurt.
• Boil a little of the water, dissolve the stock cube in it and pour it into the pot.
• Add the rest of the water.
• Put the outer leaves on top of the cabbage and rib mixture to help conserve the juices during cooking.
• Cover the pot and cook on the middle shelf of the oven at 160C for about 90 minutes until the meat on the ribs is tender.
• Check the seasoning and when cooked, correct as necessary.

Serving

Serve a generous helping in large bowls with any old bread to mop up the juice, even if it is a bit stale.  If you feel like adding a few more carbs for an energetic audience then put a big bowl of fluffy mash in the middle of the table for people to help themselves.

Cost

£0.76/serving using ASDA internet grocery prices at 26th January 2014.  Not including bread or potatoes. 

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Its a double helping this week.

Next up is another hearty "Benefits Street" meal for the family that also comes with a health warning.  DO NOT feed this to children who have not had at least one hour of energetic outdoor playtime, it contains a shedload of calories.  Scrumping apples or pears counts, its cheeky and energetic especially if the owner of the apple trees is grumpy; nicking tele's from all over the parish and legging it to the fence, not over itis not, its a crime!

"Grannie Betty's" Stuffed, Roast Jacket Potatoes with sausages.

Ingredients for four servings

• 4 large baking potatoes
• 8 good quality pork sausages
• 300gm strongly flavoured "melty" cheese
• Corn oil
• Salt

Method - Potatoes

• Wash and dry the potatoes.
• Put plenty of salt in a bowl and add a generous glug or three of cooking oil.
• Put each potato into the bowl and roll it around until it is covered in salty oil.
• Cup the potato in your hand and roll it around to make sure it is thoroughly dressed with the mixture.
• Put the oily salty potatoes on a baking tray and cook them in the oven at 160 C for about forty five minutes to an hour until the are done.  They should be lovely and brown and crispy on the outside and soft in the middle when tested with a skewer.  Leave the oven turned on we're going to need it again.
• When cooked, take the potatoes from the oven and carefully (they'll be hot) put each on a chopping board and cut into halves with a sharp knife try to keep the skins intact.
• Scoop out the lovely centres and set aside in a clean bowl.  You should have just the crispy skins left.
• Grate the cheese into the bowl containing the potato flesh, tip the cooking oil in too if you like and mash it and the cheese into the potato.  Do NOT grate your knuckles and fingertips, I don't know what they taste like but its painful and you'll need them again tomorrow!
• Load the cheese/potato mixture back into the skins, put them back on the roasting tray and then back into the oven until the cheese mixture starts to bubble up and the potato mash gets brown and a little crispy on top.

Method - Sausages

There are two ways, traditional or the low calorie, "Ellesmere Port" way if you're trying to save on calories (who could be really, making this meal?) it's your call.   However I will explain, 'coz you might like to use the low calorie method another time.

The traditional way

• Prick the sausages all over then just put them on a tray in the oven alongside the spuds while they are cooking until the sausages are cooked to your liking.
• I normally put them in for about twenty minutes (half the cooking time of the potatoes.) 

The 'Ellesmere Port' low calorie way!

So called because when my first ex (the nice one, not the other,) was training to be a midwife, she was sent to lodge with an 'old bird' in Ellesmere Port whilst she was training to deliver babies; who insisted on poaching sausages before she grilled them. Obviously to get the fat out, but I often wondered, and for those of you not in the know, Ellesmere Port in Cheshire is one of the biggest manufacturers of heavy chemicals in the UK, whether it might also be a way to remove environmental contaminants too!

• Boil a large pan of salted water and then reduce it to a simmer.
• Prick the sausages all over then add them to the pan.
• Bring the water back up to a rolling simmer so as to poach the sausages without splitting the skins and cook for about fifteen minutes.
• Tip the greasy water from the pan then put the sausages on a tray and as before, roast them in the oven until the skins are brown.  They will be drier, so take care not to burn them.

Serving

Put two of the loaded potato halves on a plate with a pair of the sausages and if you feel like adding a side serving, baked beans go well.

Cost

£1.70 per serving, less if you use budget bangers, not including beans.

P.S. "Granny Betty," so called by my daughter, was my late mum.  She is the inspiration for my love of food and cooking and could make a delicious dinner from an old shoe.  Thanks mum!


Eat and enjoy - more recipes another day when I feel inspired!

Nigella's picture courtesy of "The Daily Mirror"

Sins on Sunday are allowed. At least this one is!

Steamed Sticky Toffee Sultana Pudding, with Salted Caramel Sauce 

 

 

Now I know that everybody and his or her uncle is on a diet right now.  I am, but you know and I know that if you’re going to make a real difference, it has to be a lifestyle change not just for January!  And so in my case I’m resisting booze for a month and for the next three months I’ve given up; bread, milk, eggs, cheese, butter, red meat and potatoes, but not forever and not on Sundays!  Just until my belly gets smaller and my stomach gets used to being full on less.  And I’m taking at least an hour of exercise each weekday.  Roll on “Stick Insect.”

OK end of Sunday sermon, because now I’m going to tell you about your Sunday sin!  A diet sin is OK so long as it is a planned part of your new regime, not just a relapse, Oh ‘sod it’, I’ll start again on Monday is not good don’t do it!  Plan your sins, have what you fancy once or twice a week!  In my case it’s a “Full English” on Saturday and if they’re on offer some roast spuds with my Sunday lunch.  So today I’m going to help you make today’s delicious sin;

Steamed Sticky Toffee Sultana Pudding, with Salted Caramel Sauce

As well as the ingredients, you’ll need:-

Patience and planning.  This dish takes around 30 minutes to make, but around three hours to cook, but it really is worth the wait.  Watch your guest’s faces as they lick their spoons and wonder if they could possibly fit “seconds” in!

• Silicone kitchen paper

• Aluminium Foil

• Pudding Basin (1Litre)

• Large Mixing Bowl

• Electric Mixer

• Large Pan for steaming

• Food Processor and a variety of spoons and jugs.

 

Ingredients and Method

Sticky Toffee Sultana Pudding Mixture

 
200g stoned dates
100gm golden sultana
1 tbsp vanilla essence
50g/ soft butte
175g brown sugar
4 tbsp golden syrup
200gm self raising flour
2 eggs
1½ tsp bicarbonate of soda

Salty Caramel Sauce

200ml double cream

100g butter

175g brown sugar

1 dessert spoon water

1 tsp coarse sea salt

Method - Pudding

First

·        Get ready by half filling the large saucepan with water and bringing it to the boil, then reduce to a simmer.  Carefully put a saucer in the bottom before the water boils.  The saucer makes certain that the base of the pudding basin is always immersed in water and never touches the bottom of the pan directly.

·         Prepare the pudding basin by greasing it with runny butter. Add some of the brown sugar and shake it about until the inside of the basin is coated in sugar.  Throw out the excess

Then

·         Put the the dates and half the sultanas in a jug and scald with boiling water for five minutes.  Then tip out all but 100ml of the water and “blitz” them in a blender or food processor until they’re not quite a paste and you can still make out a few small’ish lumps on the mixture.  Add the vanilla essence and give one more ‘whizz.’

 

·         Beat the softened butter and brown sugar together in a mixing bowl, with the electric whisk until smooth.

·         Add the golden syrup, flour, eggs, bicarbonate of soda the blended dates and the rest of the sultanas. Stir gently until thoroughly mixed.

·         Pour the mixture into the prepared basin. Make a circle of silicone paper about 10cm larger than the diameter of the basin, butter one side.  Put it on top of the basin, butter side down and tuck the edges under the rim of the basin as well as you can. Next put a circle of aluminium foil on top of the silicone paper and fold the edges over the side of the pudding basin in a pleat.  And if you haven’t got a special lidded pudding basin, like mine, then tie the foil to the basin with a couple of turns of string.  Make a good tight knot and then loop the string so as to make a handle to lift the pudding out, later.

·         Put the basin into the saucepan of simmering water. Put the lid on the pan and control the heat to maintain a gentle simmer for three hours!  Remember not to let the pan boil dry!

Method – Salty Caramel Sauce

 

·         Put a pan over a low heat add the dessert spoonful of water and the salt.  Wait for the salt to dissolve.

·         Add the sugar, stirring all the time until the water, salt, sugar mixture is well mixed. 

·         Add the butter stirring continuously until the mixture starts to froth.  Remove from the heat and test it by putting a drop of the mixture on to a cold saucer.  If it hardens, it is ready, if not cook for a little longer.  Take care not to burn the mixture – it will taste dreadful.  If you do, start again.

·         When the mixture is ready, add the cream, stirring all the time until you get a lovely thick creamy sauce.  It looks like the top layer of a ‘Mars’ Bar, but runnier.

·         Take the pudding from the pan, carefully, take off the lids then put a serving plate on top of the basin, invert it and wait.  The pudding will slowly ‘plop’ down on to the pate and be ready to eat!  Dress the pud with a little of the sauce and serve in individual portions.  Put a jug of extra sauce on the table from which people can help themselves – they will!

·         Serve with Ice cream or crème fraiche!

OK folks – that’s it for today.  Remember though, no more sins until next Sunday!

Perfect boiled eggs every time! The last tip for 2013. If you have been, thanks for following. Happy Christmas and a Peaceful New year

I absolutely guarantee that you will get a perfect bolied egg, even a boiled egg, with a set white and a runny yolk every time by following these few simple steps.

Requirements

Pan with lid

Egg(s)

Water 

Heat

Method

Put the egg(s) in the pan and cover them with cold water

Bring the water to the boil

Immediately the water boils remove the pan from the heat and cover it 

Set the timer for exactly three minutes, when the timer goes off remove the eggs and get them to the table as quickly as possible.

Eat immediately with buttered toast soldiers

Beetroot and Walnut Hummus - One for the Boxing Day Buffet.

First I must credit Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall, one of the TV chefs I actually admire, as the inspiration for this recipe. You know him, he's the one with the scruffy hair, goggly stare, big specs - an intense almost evangelical approach to cooking and food. He's usually broadcasting outdoors from a muddy river bank or in a screaming rainy gale in the wilds of the Herefordshire countryside, wielding a wild mushroom and telling the viewers how to cook it with an even wilder squirrel!

No, stupid! Not the lovely late lamented "lets have a slurp" Keith Floyd, the poor chap died years ago, sadly; drunk and skint, but at least he had lived, rather too much I fear, RIP Keith!

My recipe has a more intense and distinctly Mediterranean feel about it than HFW's and NO bread in it. If you want bread, eat this dip with delicious home-made pitta bread!

Beetroot Hummus

Take a close look at the breakfast table in the picture, just above the croissants, you'll see a little white bowl and in it a "cyan" coloured dip.  Voila! Beetroot Hummus! It looks a bit lurid, but the flavour ...... yummy!

There's a funny story related to this picture.  It was taken illustrate the brunch offering in my guest apartment - look at www.ibizahomestay.com for more details (not yet though, I still need to revise it for 2014) well, you can if you like, but some of the text is out of date. I'll be keeping the 2014 tariff the same as 2013.

On with the tale.  A group of lovely Swedish girls came to visit and wanted a vegetarian brunch.  This is a picture of what I made for them.  Later that day I was having friends round and making a chicken and leek pie for them. As the smell of it reached the terrace, the girls wanted to know what I was cooking, so I told them - "Ooh, its smells so good" they said, "could we just have a little taste of the leeks and cheese Bechamel, please?"  No problem.  Then one of them scooped a bit of chicken up with her taste, by accident. "Mmmm, that's meat!" she said, "but not so bad!"  Then the rest of them dived in, liked it, started to giggle (by the way, there were no special Ibiza ingredients in it) and went off into a huddle.  So when I asked them what was making them laugh, they said "we have decided that from now on Chicken is officially a Swedish vegetable!"

Beetroot and Walnut Hummus

Ingredients

100g walnuts

1 tbsp cumin seeds

200g roasted beetroot coarsely chopped

1 tbsp tahini or more, to taste 

1 large garlic clove, crushed

Juice of one, or more lemons, to taste

sea salt, to taste

freshly ground black pepper, to taste

olive oil

Method

Preheat the oven to 180C

Wash the beetroot well to clean off any soil, do not peel or cut off anything other than a straggly root and the foliage, then rub well with olive oil, wrap in aluminium foil and roast at 180C on a middle shelf until tender. Usually about 45 minutes to an hour.

Allow the beetroots to cool, then peel and coarsely chop them

Sauteé the walnuts, stirring constantly, in a little olive oil in a heavy frying pan until they begin toast lightly and release their lovely aroma.  Take care they burn very easily

Toast the cumin for a few seconds in a hot pan then grind it, finely, in a pestle and mortar or spice grinder

Transfer the ground cumin, beetroot, tahini, garlic, half the lemon juice, a little salt and a grind or two of pepper to a food processor and blend to a thick paste. 

Taste the mixture and season it to your own taste with salt, pepper, more lemon juice and olive oil.

Eat with homemade, thin, warm pitta bread

End Note

Do not feed any leftovers to "Rover" or "Fido."  'Cos when you take him out for his early morning "business meeting" you may be inclined to rush him straight to the vet :-)  You have been warned!

Grandma's Pea and Ham soup and a rant!

One of my pet hates is the food produced on competitive TV cooking programmes, I'll be having a rant at the BBC, not just you, shortly!  The ingredients are expensive and extravagant; not even the most ardent home cook could either afford or find room for  the equipment used and the finished dishes are more worthy of the walls of the National Gallery than the table - edible art on a plate. Oh and whilst I'm at it, who the blazes wants to stare down John Torode's throat way past his tonsils as he chomps his way through "Lightly Roasted Pigs Nose and a hint of smoked cauliflower foam with an Owl turd jus!"  That's a job for his dentist, not TV viewers!  Let's get real, nourishing, inexpensive and hearty food is fun to make and healthy. 

Life wasn't always easy in the 20's and 30's when my grandparents were raising families in the north of England. In fact keeping body and soul together was top priority after getting a job and keeping it.  My Gran and Auntie Lizzie had a tough time raising dad and mum, but one thing is for sure, there was always a delicious meal on the table each night even if the ingredients cost next to nothing and would probably scare the pants off some of today's young mums and dads if you put them down on the kitchen worktop and said make something delicious from this!

Today's recipe harks back to those times and is still relevant to the tough times we're having today.

Ingredients

• Water 
• Dried marrowfat peas - 1 packet 250gm
• Pork Hock - 1
• Carrots - 4
• Onion - 1
• Bay leaves, to taste, I use three
• Salt, to your taste but wait until the soup is made before adding seasoning.

* Pork hock is a pigs knuckle joint, found below the ham, fore leg or hind, it doesn't really matter, above the 'trotter,' it has loads of meat, and when cooked releases lots of lovely rich sticky gelatine into your finished soup.   It is highly prized in Germany and much of Northern Europe. 

Method

Day one - evening

• Put the dried peas in a large bowl, big enough to allow the peas to expand to two or even three times their dry volume. Add a pinch of bicarbonate of soda if you have it. 
• Boil a full kettle of water scald the peas with it and leave overnight to soak.

Next day.

• Peel and chop the carrot into medium sized pieces, do the same with the onion.
• Drain the soak water from the peas and rinse them well with cold water in a colander under a running tap
• Wash the hock well in cold water
• Put the hock into the largest pan you have, scatter the peas and vegetables over it and cover the meat and vegetables with plenty of water.  Put the bay leaves on top
• Set the pan onto the hob and bring it gently to the boil.

• Skim and discard any scum from the top of the cooking liquor as the water boils.
• Once the liquor boils put a lid on the pan and turn down the heat to a rolling simmer.
• Then wait for as much as four hours for the peas and meat to cook!  Slow cooking releases and combines all the delicious flavours of the ingredients. 
• When you are happy that everything is cooked, remove the lid from the pan and take out the hock. Set it aside on a chopping board and gently remove the bones, fat and skin.  If you have pets, they'll love the trimmings!  
• Remove the bay leaves.
• Break the pork into bite sized pieces and put it back into the pan, then decide what consistency you want the soup to be.  I like mine quite thick, so I reduce the contents of the pan until the soup is the consistency of loose porridge.  Your choice.
• Check the seasoning and add salt or a chicken stock cube to your own taste.

Finally

For a main course serve a generous portion in large bowls, making sure that each serving contains chunks of pork.  Eat and enjoy your soup with warm crusty bread.

As an h'ors d'oeuvre serve rather less, but still expect to be asked for "seconds."

This soup keeps well in the fridge for several days - put it in a suitable covered plastic container then heat it up as you want it.  To store it for longer, put portions in the freezer in airtight zip-lock bags.

Spuds (potatoes to non Brits) a classic crafty tip!

Billy's Birthday Potatoes

It's my dear chum "Farmer Bill's" birthday in November and as usual I let myself be conned into cooking his birthday dinner, for around fourteen people. "I don't care what you make" he said, "but I want a lot of potatoes with it". Bill, you see, grew spuds for most of his farming life, support the old firm I suppose.

"Ok" I said "go and get some for me" which he did and must have come back with 25kg or more, full of soil straight from his brother's field. Almost as much muck as potato!

How the blazes am I going to clean them and get dinner ready on time I thought to myself? Then as I was heaving the sack through the utility room beside the back door, came the brainwave. Why not heave them straight into the washing machine?  Yes why not?  I did and it worked.

Make sure there are no dirty (or clean for that matter) underpants lurking inside, load the drum with the potatoes, set the programme to cold wash and high speed spin, then voila!  In about twenty minutes you'll have a machine full of polished potatoes ready to cook, roast, boil or bake!

"ELF and SAFETY WARNING!" DO NOT put washing powder or fabric conditioner in the machine.

Oh and another thing. It's such a drag peeling tons of spuds, so if you have one of those frenchy, cheffy, windyroundy apple peeling machines, use it to peel your potatoes. You get a nice furrowed finish and a long tail of potato peel. Then deal with the result as you like and for the super frugal, you can deep fry the skin you peel off as a fancy garnish or curly whirlysnack!